Dreaming of Doors

 In a post last year, I described an encounter with a figure I refer to as my ‘Guide,’ but might as well call my Animus. I borrow the word from Jung in order to refer to a (from what I’ve encountered) male aspect of my subconscious, but not in the complete sense of what Jung described. Generally, this figure shows up to let me know that the dream has some sort of significance and should be examined for symbols. The last time I encountered him, it was August of 2010 - and he said it was going to be a long time before I encountered him again. Nearly a year later, in a recent dream, I came face to face with him just before waking.

Surviving Dreams

Dreams, in the sense of goals, fantasies, desires and wishes for the future, play such a big role in western culture. So much of what we do is about plotting and planning for the future.

We save, we scrimp, we sacrifice and fight to achieve things later - and once they’ve passed, we’re still looking forward. Consumerism in our daily lives provides lots of examples in the ads we see everywhere: buy this insurance so if something happens later you’re prepared. Buy this gum so that if a kiss comes your way your breath doesn’t stink. Buy these clothes so your children will make friends at school. Buy this car to impress a possible date.

Buy these so that you don’t spend thousands on clothes/food/healthcare/college!

Certainly, I’m not saying it’s unwise to plan for the future. We know that an event in the past has direct effect on the future, and we like to be prepared for things. But we focus so much on what’s coming. I’ve been told in the past that we don’t move forward without cause - the only reason we hunt is because we’re hungry for something. We shoot for dreams: once we’ve captured them, we settle in, satisfied - or complacent. It’s either that or find something more to hunt down.

What about me? Do I have dreams?

Sour Dreams

Anyone who’s been following along so far would know that, based on my past posts regarding Symbolism, Dream Guides and spiritual direction, that I hold dreams in pretty high regard. Even if dreams are just the result of the mind spitting out random images and ideas, I believe very strongly that they provide a window into the subconscious and the things that worry - or delight us - the most.

A month or two back, I was plagued by stressful dreams about my father, and life in general. I chased them off by hanging up a dream catcher near my bed, and putting a special gris-gris near my sleeping area, with carefully selected items inside to - if the intent was correct - redirect any bad dreams so that if they didn’t hit the dream catcher, they still wouldn’t get to me.

For a while, this seemed to work. If one were to believe the idea that Dreams come from outside the body or mind, and were the result of spiritual or magical influence, these measures made sense. And as I’ve said before, if they can affect my subconscious and give me calm, then I don’t care whether or not they’re magic.

But what if the cause of the dreams is completely internal? Magic or not, if I’m setting up things to keep out bad influences and ignoring the cause of stress carried in my own subconscious, then I’m not going to be very effective.

I’m bringing this all up because, much to my annoyance and loss of rest, the stressful dreams have returned with a vengeance.

Dreaming of Halloween

I had another one of my strange dreams last night. It was kind of funny to me in that it was seasonally appropriate.

I was walking alone at night, down a small paved road with trees on either side. There were bright lights strung up all around - orange, white and yellow. All the trees were beautiful shades of red and orange.

There was a cottage at the end of the path, decorated with fall wreaths, Indian corn, pumpkins, squash, etc. I knew that I was supposed to go in, so I did.

Inside, the house was decorated for Halloween, and there were bowls of candy out. I didn’t see them at first, but there were a bunch of other women in the house with me - some little girls, some teenage girls, some women (who I somehow knew were the mothers of the children) and a very old woman who seemed to be in charge of everyone. EVERYONE was wearing a costume - the little girls were dressed mostly as fairies and imps, and older girls were dressed mostly in fantasy costumes - goddesses, witches, queens, etc. Everyone was laughing and working on small crafts, or cooking.

But something strange was going on in the back of the main room.

Strange Dreams 2 - and The Wheel of Dharma

I'm gonna be honest - this one is RIDICULOUSLY long. Today’s post is about another dream, in which I met sort of a spiritual guide. If you’re more interested in reading about The Wheel of Dharma - which I’m sure is the more interesting topic for most people who might visit this blog - then hit the jump and scroll down until you see “The Wheel of Dharma” in bold. Otherwise... well, you'll probably be bored. Just a warning.

Tarot in the Student Life Center

I was sitting in the student life center at the college I go to, relaxing with my boyfriend as we waited for my class time to roll around. I took out my tarot deck and did a quick reading for myself – the results told me for the second time in two weeks that I needed to turn to my boyfriend for help with my bad dreams and worries – and was about to do a reading for him, when;

“Hey, what is that, a tarot deck there?”

There was an older man, latino, with a bushy mustache with a few threads of white in it. He was smiling, and seemed curious.

“Yeah,” I smiled back.

“You know how to do it?”

“Yeah, but I just started doing it earlier this year.”

I described the kind of spread I was using*, and he responded by telling me the style he used.

Pictured: Celtic Cross and Staff layout - aka, the style I use.

“How long have you been doing it?” I asked.

“All my life,” he responded.

He explained that his mother had taught him and his siblings, and that her mother had taught her, and so on. Grinning, he moved to our booth and asked me to do a reading for him. When I finished, he seemed pleased, and told me I’d read correctly. He then asked if I’d mind if he did a reading for me.

I was more than happy, and handed him the cards.

He then spread the cards out, flipping a card up every four cards. A top row of cards was my past and present, and the next three told my future. He used the entire deck in the reading, and used a method that depended almost completely on the face image of the card, rather than the symbols in the picture. But still, he touched on key points –

“Your father is worried a lot about you… he wants to protect you.” Another card – “A man in your family who loves you is waiting for your call.” He also made references to marriage and fortune coming my way.

Overall, it was a very strange and unfamiliar way (to me) to read the cards, but the things he said still made sense to me.

I couldn’t help but think of my dream – tarot cards with meanings I’d never heard of before, with images and values I’d never seen or thought of, but still having meaning nonetheless. I understood, then, the lesson I was supposed to learn:

There are many valid methods of doing a reading, or interpreting the cards – many of them are traditional, and blend different beliefs (he had me make the sign of the cross on the deck before the reading) but all work. It just depends on the person.

In my dream, the new form of Tarot was handed from one practitioner to another, who then inadvertently handed it to me.

The man had pointed to one card, and told me: “Someone old and wise will send you a message, in a dream - or already did.”

Smiling, and wondering what his grandmother and mother looked like in their youth, I nodded. Maybe they already had.

*there are different interpretations regarding what position in cross/staff means what, but I use this:

1) the key issue of the reading

2) Obstacles in the way of resolving problems related to the issue

3) Subconscious traits

4) Conscious traits

5) Past

6) Present

7) Who the questioner is to the people around them

8) Who the people around the questioner are

9) hopes and fears

10) Probable outcome

Strange Dreams

I think that most people who dream (and remember their dreams) experience at some point or another 'meaningful' dreams. Dreams that seem to predict something about upcoming events, or just seem like they're trying to send a message.

I typically have several very odd dreams every night - ranging from flying over the countryside to fighting zombies en masse. But I also have highly emotional dreams, mostly about my parents or loved ones, about regrets, and things I feel frustrated about.

Many Native American beliefs teach that to ignore your dreams is dangerous, and could cause illness and madness - certainly, many people believe that dreams are the mind's way of working out problems it can't deal with during the day; a pressure valve, so to speak, or a filter. Freud believed that our dreams were the result of our desires and wishes combined with the activities we do all day, and that nothing we see in a dream can be made up. Rather, everything in a dream is remembered from our lives in some shape or form. There are countless theories about dreams and dream interpretation, what causes us to dream and why we do it, but no one really knows for sure.

I'd like to believe, for me at least, that dreams really do act as a way for the mind to work out problems in a safe environment. A way to deal with stress or maybe just experience something wonderful. Like I said, I dream a lot about my parents - I worry about my mother, and my relationship with my father right now is more or less nonexistent because I'm afraid of talking to him. So in my dreams, I endure situations with my mom where we're fighting or angry (I worry about our relationship going bad) and I have nightmares about my father controlling my life with fear and guilt. In my dreams I can react in ways I wouldn't (or couldn't) in real life, for fear of retaliation. The consequences I experience in dreams are impermanent, but the implications are powerful and can be a great aid in every day life and dealing with life problems.